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RC Boldt
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BLUE BALLS Kindle Edition

by RC Boldt (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
4.5 out of 5 stars 334 ratings
USA Today bestselling author of CLAM JAM brings us yet another laugh-out-loud romantic comedy about two people who experience "setbacks" at the most inopportune times...

What happens when the universe gets in the way of your "follow through"?
BLUE BALLS
Truth: A painful condition caused by a prolonged state of sexual arousal without release.
Myth: Only affects males.

SARAH
I’m beyond frustrated with the man who’s left me high and very far from dry. Multiple times. But, somehow, even though I’m not interested in a relationship, Mr. Tall-Dark-and-Handsome keeps me coming back for more—one crazy, sexual debacle after the next.
Come hell or high water, the stars will align, and the release will be out of this world.

JACK
I’m captivated with the woman who’s left me sixty-nine shades of blue, and she's only in this for one thing. The first time, I blew it—and not in the good way—but I’m going to ensure we finally see it through. I need to put an end to this “plague” of sexual calamities and prove to Sarah that we can have more. It's time to grab the universe by the balls and show it who's boss.
It's time to grab the universe by the balls and show it who's boss.

TROPES:
Boy falls first
Orphan Found Family
Close Proximity
Will they or won't they?

Praise for BLUE BALLS:

"Blue Balls is everything I love in a breezy, sexy, laugh-out-loud romcom! It’s like hanging out with a hilarious and totally inappropriate best friend—I adored every minute.”—New York Times bestselling author Annika Martin

"RC Boldt delivers a pee in your pants, hand-over-your-heart awe mix in her latest captivating romantic comedy, Blue Balls.”—Author Piper Rayne

"A laugh-out-loud, tears streaming down your face, unforgettable, sexy, 10-star rom-com that I never wanted to end. I'm an RC Boldt fan for life."—Marni Mann Author

"RC never disappoints and leads us down a road of laughter, honestly, and moments that are unforgettable." —A Book Lovers Emporium "Another winner and must read from Ms. Boldt! I wish I could give it 10 stars!!!!" - A Book Nerd Bookseller & Bibliophile Blog

"Laugh Out Loud...Pee In Your Pants...(just wear depends...it's ok I won't judge) Romantic Comedy... I swear I want to jump in the book and be a fly on the wall. I haven't laughed, chuckled or shook my head thinking "really did that just happen" in such a long time with a book. Again, I just can't. HILARIOUS!!!!"—Chasing the Words Book Blog

"A definite must read and great for your stomach muscles!"—Goodreads Reviewer "Five Laugh-out-loud and snort/spray-your-drink stars!"—Author Teresa Michaels
Previous slide of product details
  1. Print length
    314 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publication date
    8 Aug. 2017
  4. File size
    4.3 MB
  5. Page Flip
    Enabled
  6. Word Wise
    Enabled
  7. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
Next slide of product details

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B073TJF11Q
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ RC BOLDT PUBLISHING, LLC; 2nd edition (8 Aug. 2017)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 4.3 MB
  • Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 314 pages
  • Customer reviews:
    4.5 out of 5 stars 334 ratings

About the author

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RC Boldt

RC Boldt

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RC Boldt is a USA Today bestselling author whose novels have been published in multiple languages. She currently lives in part of the Costa Rican jungle and is determined to master the bachata by her fiftieth birthday.

Customer reviews

4.5 out of 5 stars
334 global ratings

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Top reviews from United Kingdom

  • Book lover
    5.0 out of 5 stars Laugh out loud book
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 8 August 2017
    Verified Purchase
    Oh my what can I say about Blue Balls??
    Firstly I have never had a fit of giggles like I did on the first page and getting rudely told by a snoring hubby to shush. But anyway the rest of this book didn’t fail.

    We first met Sarah and Jack in Clam Jam with Maggie and Ryan. But now Blue Balls has all the laughter and more I mean how many times did Jack and Sarah get close?? I was like come on give the guy some slack and I admit I did feel kinda sorry for Jack at times. And the conversations with Sarah and herself oh geez some of the things said. 😂😂😂😂

    Ms Boldt has not failed with this book and you will love it. I know I did but please read Clam Jam first to get the back story.
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  • Liv
    4.0 out of 5 stars You won’t be able to stop laughing!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 29 August 2017
    This book was told from a dual POV and while Sarah's was more crazy and hilarious, Jack's was more easygoing and level-headed.

    I seriously loved the funny banter and messages between Sarah and Jack, which had me constantly smiling or laughing. There wasn't any 'in between' as there was always something happening (or Sarah embarrassing herself) and my laugh muscles never got a break to relax. Working out had never been so fun. =P

    The characters had such bad luck; I was surprised at how often they had been interrupted. It was like everything that could possibly go wrong happened to them. I almost felt bad for them especially because it nearly got me blue balls as well while cheering them on to get it finally done just to be left high and dry yet again or rather drenched and on the brink of getting the long longed for release, just to have it snatched away from them seconds before.

    The Story:
    There had been some chemistry between Jack and Sarah since the first time they've met and it doesn't take long for them to act out on it. But it seems that the odds aren't in their favor as they give each other nothing more than blue balls. No matter how often they went at it, something always interrupted them. Maybe the universe is against them? But what when feelings get into the mix? Can they overcome their bad luck and finally rid themselves of the painful BB? Or is there just no way out and the best way would be to move on?

    Thoughts:
    To be honest, this book was so hard to rate. I tried to think during the read about how much I liked it but even now after I finished it, I couldn't really decide. I also tried to compare it to the author's other books but then thought it wouldn't be fair because this was too different and uniquely written.
    I really liked the writing because it was refreshing and fun, although it probably isn't everybody’s taste. (If you read an excerpt of this book or have read the book already, you will know what I mean regarding Sarah's inner voice.)

    The chocolate messages were a nice addition especially because Maggie and Ry had their napkins and I loved that our new couple also had something special. I think that it mixed well with the funny side in the book because the chocolate added something different and more sentimental which grew throughout the story.

    It made me happy that Maggie and Ry were in this book as well because I adored their story and I felt that this book had a nice ending for both couples.

    (Ok, the only thing that I'd have liked to see more of would've been of the emotional kind. I get that Sarah was scared because of how her parents parted and what her mother did but the characters spent so much time together and the main focus of the story was the fun side - which I understand and also liked because it obviously was a RomCom - but I just wished to see more of their feelings growing.)
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  • Liz
    5.0 out of 5 stars Absolutely brilliant. A must read
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 13 September 2017
    Verified Purchase
    Sarah and Jacks story follows on from Clam Jam where you initially meet them. I thought Maggie and Ry's story was brilliant but Blue Balls is off the scales. Sarah and Jacks antics make for hilarious reading and the poor nun who keeps bumping into Sarah has really bad timing. This is one book that you will always go back to read this I can guarantee as it has everything you could ask for in a Rom Com.
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  • Sandra Loves Reading
    5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Reading!!!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 8 August 2017
    Verified Purchase
    I loved this book!
    I laughed and giggled my way through it.
    Jack and Sarah had one disaster after another trying to do THE DEED, and all they ended up with was... even more frustration. Every. Single. Time.
    Hilarious!!!
    The sense of anticipation wasn't for them actually hooking up, it was for the next disaster! And the laughs didn't stop when they eventually did.
    Excellent reading!!!
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  • Sharon Thérèse
    3.0 out of 5 stars A light-hearted, light-weight romance and some funny moments
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 17 August 2017
    Reviewed by Anna Green on behalf of KFF

    This is a story about Sarah and Jack. Sarah is a nurse anaesthetist and has issues about love and relationships because of her parents. She is not into permanent relationships. Wham, bam and she’s off. And then she meets Jack. Jack is an independent business consultant and is the best man to his best friend Ry and Maggie’s wedding. He was a nerd in high school but earned his mojo when he went to college and later on became a successful businessman.

    Written in dual points of view, the tale of Jack and Sarah is a romantic comedy but their bungled attempts in hooking up in some supposedly hilarious situations failed to make me laugh most of the time. There are a few scenes that I found humorous and made me smile and giggle but these are few and far between. The first half of the book’s timeline is about this two meeting up to help arrange their best friends’ wedding and by the end of the day trying to get into each other’s pants and almost always before reaching third base either an alarm goes off, a minor accident happens that merits a quick visit to the ER and so on. It makes you wonder what natural disaster is going to happen next when they start making out. Are they ever going to have their “happy ending”?

    There’s hardly any character development for both characters. It doesn’t help that their background were barely explained and you only get to know more about their past history after three quarters of the book. For someone whose job is about caring for patients I find Sarah a bit selfish and insensitive especially when interacting with Jack. I find Jack more likeable. He is an adorable dork, attractive, funny and honest whilst Sarah is often in denial of her growing feelings towards him. All she was interested in was his “Roman hands and Russian fingers”.

    Sarah’s gay best friend, Clint summed up their “romance” and in my opinion aptly described the whole book in these words: “You guys are just two Calamity Janes trying to navigate your way to the elusive Orgasm Island.” He pauses. “Or two Magoos, blindly fumbling your way to Bang-Bang-ville.”

    This is a light-hearted story, no angst, no millionaires, rockers or bikers involved, only two people who may or may not find their happily ever after. I gave this book 3 stars.
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Top reviews from other countries

  • Janeen Butcher
    5.0 out of 5 stars ARC in exchange for an honest review
    Reviewed in the United States on 8 August 2017
    Verified Purchase
    Poor Jack. The man has NO game whatsoever. He thinks he knows what women want, but the follow through is sooo bad. He was a card carrying member of the nerd pack before he met Ry and he helped transform him into the guy he is now...which is the Hot guy!! He's such a likeable guy that you really can't help wanting to smack Sarah throughout the whole book. She's stubborn and kind of a nymphomaniac. Her inner dialogue is about sex, her musings are about sex and she talks about sex. Jack wants a relationship and Sarah just wants to have fun. What ensues are situations that are both funny and emotional. Emotional because you get to see how Jack was when he was younger and funny because I will never look at a nuns habit in quite the same way. The author states at the beginning of the book that the things that happen in the book are things that have happened to her friends in real life which made it for me - hilarious! How many times have we been about to do something and been interrupted by a bunch of nuns who are stalking us? Oh, is that just me? No? If you want to read a book and laugh through the whole thing, wake your family up repeatedly until they're throwing stuff at you and calling your best friend to tell her you're buying her this book when it comes out. I have come to love RC's style and humor and this book is no exception

    An ARC was provided from the publisher/author in exchange for an honest review. All opinions expressed are my own and do not reflect anyone else's.
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  • Whit J
    4.0 out of 5 stars good read
    Reviewed in the United States on 9 February 2024
    Verified Purchase
    This was an enjoyable read. I liked the characters and the story line. This was Another humorous story from this author.
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  • Emilie Tomaro
    5.0 out of 5 stars Everyone needs to get some BLUE BALLS!
    Reviewed in the United States on 8 August 2017
    Verified Purchase
    Blue Balls...
    Blue Balls...
    Blue Balls...

    F'in HILLARIOUS!

    Laugh Out Loud...
    Pee In Your Pants...
    (just wear depends...it's ok I won't judge)
    Romantic Comedy...

    I swear I want to jump in the book and be a fly on the wall. I haven't laughed, chuckled or shook my head thinking "really did that just happen" in such a long time with a book. Again, I just can't. HILLARIOUS!!!!

    I can't take it! The text messages between Jack and Sarah - Blue Balls - just PRICELESS!!! Every moment with them was like FATE saying nope not happening tonight let's try this instead.

    Then Sarah and her F'in inner dialogue. I could vividly picture her in her head with her arms flaying around and cocking her head from side to the side being all dramatic. Just HILLARIOUS!!!! Seriously I just can't.

    R.C. Boldt, I was totally 100% obsessed with this book and it was just what I needed every night after a stressful day at work. If I could give it more then 5 Stars I would. I thought I loved Jack and Sarah in Clam Jam but I think I truly fell in love with them in Blue Balls.

    I loved this book to pieces...just one-click it. You won't be disappointed- come in now the book is about BLUE BALLS.

    * Review by Chasing The Words Book Blog
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  • we're-bear
    5.0 out of 5 stars Crazy Love
    Reviewed in the United States on 6 September 2017
    Verified Purchase
    I absolutely loved this book. The first few pages that I read, I was laughing. Sarah and Jack's story is truly a cosmic collision. They are trying so hard, but keep getting blue balled. I mean, signs are real but, so is true love and they finally find it. Sarah is just trying to not be her mom, but in doing so she's closing herself off to love from Jack. Jack is trying to see pass his nerdy years and just wants to love Sarah. He has fight for what's was t and I love that in my book boyfriends. Thank you RC Bolts for such an amazing and fun story.
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  • Iza Loves Books
    4.0 out of 5 stars Every gal wants a man like Jack
    Reviewed in the United States on 5 September 2017
    Verified Purchase
    After reading Clam Jam I went straight onto Blue Balls. This one I didn't love quite as much. I'd been excited for it because I'd loved Jack in Clam Jam. He's sexy, gorgeous and a really good guy. I thought he might be a bit of a player at first but he's not even close. He and Sarah are attracted to one another but every time they get down and dirty, something happens. Alarms going off, accidents that result in trips to the ER, falling asleep. You name it, it happens. It was funny the first few times but then I got bored with it. I just wanted them to get their 'happy moment' together FINALLY.
    Sarah grated on my nerves a little. She had a hot, sexy man who suffered numerous cases of 'blue balls' and yet admitted spending time with her was more important to him than just sex but she ran a mile every time he showed her any real signs of affection. Towards the end of the book I was thinking if she didn't want him, I'd take him. So again, an enjoyable read, just not as much as Clam Jam for me.
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